mom put her foot in her mouth

SO as we all know mom has an obsession with being able to do a lot of pull-ups. Mom told Frank that if Hilary Swank won the best actress Oscar for Million Dollar Baby, she would have to do 3 sets of 10 pull ups unassisted, and be able to either run a half marathon (well at least 8 miles). I think she said she had to be able to do it by her birthday. Haha Hilary Swank won

and now mom has to do it. Did you know that Hilary Swank put on something like 17 pounds of muscle for the movie, and she had to wake up in the middle of the night just to eat more? Mom better use the summer wisely. Lets hope she won't make me run with her, She already tortures me with the insane amount of stairs I have to go up every day. Good thing I still have her fooled with my "fear" of going down stairs. . .

Mom's New Tat!

When it comes to self inflicted pain Mom does what she can to make it happen as often as possible. Whether it's a good flossing, multiple ear piercings, nose piercings and now a tattoo. She left me at 6:00 yesterday, I could tell she was nervous: shakey, panting like a rabid dog foaming at the mouth. She came back that evening with a brand new tatoo. It's on left wrist and it is a black diamond. She tried to explain the signifigance, but I was more interested in the smell of fresh blood, which was oozing out. She wouldn't let me lick it and I wasn't allowed to sleep in the same bed because I could have ruined the designed. I was really hoping that she would have gotten my face tattooed on her wrist, but I guess for the first tattoo, she just wanted to do a black diamond. From what I've seen, people who get a tattoo like it so much that they end up getting another. I'll give it another month or so until there's a bichon face on her shoulder that bears a strong resemblence to yours truly.

Music

Mom loves music so much that is all I listen to all day,

when the Ashlee Simpson show is not on.
I am beginging to think that Mom loves music more than me.
Frank told mom about this great new softwear LIMEWIRE. It lets you acess any song you want over the internet for free. It workes that way because Anyone who has I-tunes has agreed to have the music they have on it shared. It is a file sharing program. I am still in limbo about weather or not I agree with it being free, but hey I'm not complaining and still downloading songs.
Some other local bands that mom loves and everyone should be a fan of are.
The Dwight Ritcher Band
oneiris
Early May
Scott Peterson
Ahab Seamus

Of course there are more but that's all I am gonna give you for now!

Vegas

It is so easy to procrastinate and spend time in noisey places to feel furfilled. I spent the last few days going to bars that I am a regular at. During that time and after money was spent, I found myself wondering what is the point? I go to Shade and eat a Creap with mom, go to The Dove and have a glass of over priced wine, and then maybe to XR bar and visit Katie and Todd. After all of that I am still where I was at the beginging of the night, and maybe I will have scored a card or a number of someone who in a drunkin promise says that they will help me with one of my on going projects. After it all what do you get except for credit card debt?
Mom and Frank last night went to The Cellar, and said goodbye to Franks friend Sam because he is going away for like 3 months to work for a Magician in Vegas at the Aladdin hotel.

Hell I would go to Vegas to get a break. To work on something I could put on my resume, to be out of the city in a hotel. I live through others and escape in non realities, and romance my way to a life that is not in the cards right now.. And the best part of it all is that Sam gets to make enough money to pay off his credit cards!

why nyc

I wonder as I am getting yet another bath why I live in NYC. Mom always said that this is the the city where everything happens, this is the place where dreams come true and this is where you need to be, to be artistic. Is that true? I feel artistic when I see a good movie, when I hear good music, and when I come up with a great new idea. Why do I need to be here, 7 flights up in the sky to be an artist? I have simple needs , I like to be petted, to be fed and to be walked. That could happen any where. Why do I need to fend off cock roaches, and watch mom being hit on be nasty men and walk down the street and get dirty every step? Here everyone is searching for something that only some get. And if that is not ok will all survive?

Forgotten

Julianne Moore has let me down. I am a big fan of hers but the movie "The Forgotten" wasted my time, and scared me for no reason. When it comes to the subject of wiping out memory and alian abduction I get excited. So when mom and Frank popped in the DVD I sat and waited to be thrilled. It fell Flat, the dialogue was weak and I wondered at the end of it all what favor Julianne Moore owed to someone to do that movie. There were good parts, and suspensful parts, but when Frank was more concerned with figuring out which part of Brooklyn the movie was shot in and reconizing the deli in DUMBO he had been to, I knew the movie was not a hit. I am going to give Julianne Moore another chance,

because she was so good in "Boogie Nights" my bar for her is still high.

Happy Valentines day!

Today is great because mom fed me whipped cream. She is making dessert for after dinner tonight. Mom and Frank have decided to make dinner in my kitchen instead of going out. I hope that they make steak and French Fries. I want the sause to drip on the floor. They will prob make something stupid like Fish. Oh well, mom let me help with dessert, and in helping Whip the cream I knocked the bowl on to the floor and mom let me lick it all up. I think she is just sick of wiping up my pee on the floor, and decided to let me act as a paper towel.

Happy Valentines Day to me!

Pull-up Bar

Frank got Mom a pull-up bar for Valentines Day! What a great gift! Mom loves to do pull-ups and I love to watch her swing from the bar like a monkey. I got a bit scared when Frank was drilling the holes into the door frame that I had to hide under the couch and cover my head with my paws! When the dumb sound stopped I was then able to witness mom act like a monkey and try and get buff like this guy!

new digs

Frank has gotten himself a new apartment in Greenpoint. Mom told me it is big and in a great neighborhood! Mom and Frank rode their bikes all day moving him into his new apartment. Mom said that Frank looked like a crazy old man on his bike. This was when he was wearing his helmut with the horns, had a milk crate filled on the back of his bike with a bedside table bunggied on top, with his large backpacking bag full on his back topped with his messenger bag on his front full, as well as riding no handed down the street! Too bad I won't see it anytime soon, well he has not invited me yet, well i guess I won't be comming unless mom strapps me on her bike which I am not ready to do! That's ok i just get to hear fun stories from mom, which is good enough, congrats Frank on your new digs!

Introducing Dr. Piggelstein

Frank thinks I am a Doctor. Why who knows?

All of a sudden he has taken to calling me Dr. Piggelstein. Don't get me wrong I love being treated with the utmost respect, but I am a few hairs shy from my degree. I have to say I do a lot of practicing in my labratory and there are always pleanty of samples I do and leave. I get most of my work done really late at night or during the day when mom is at work. I love that time because no one tries to hold me, or get in my way to scold me when I am working on a sample in my lab.

I'll give Frank this one and let him continue to call me Dr., and who knows onee day I may even have my degree!

BATHS

I don't like getting wet, I don't like being cold. Mom has this whole thing about me being clean and smelling nice. Since there was this big snow storm the sidewalk outside has been sloppy and dirty, as you can guess I have short leggs and get slapped and soaking wet and drentched with water.

Yesterday all the snow was melting, and mom and Frank took me to get coffee in the morning. I got wet and dirty and on the way back up all the stairs I heard mom tell Frank it was time for me to get a bath. Not only did I try to get as dirty as I could but I stoped and ate every single piece of stuff on the ground. It made mom so angrey that I was taking my time on the stairs that she ran up without me. I got to the door and I heard the sink running. Mom picked me up and put me under the water, I fought her the whole time, and splashed as much as I could. Finally Frank had to come in and hold me down while mom rinsed me.

With the two of them holding me down, I could not win. I think I am going to work on my strength for the next time I get a bath. I hear push-up's are the way to go.

SNOW DAY!!!

It is snowing in NYC so bad today. The snow almost covers my body. Mom is letting me run around on the roof and play with the snow.

It got a bit cold, but right before I froze my paws off mom picked me back up and made me all warm with a towel. Frank decided to be a crazy boy and bike in the snow. Mom was soo worried about him, but decided to let him be silly. He came over and told us both we were right, biking in this amount of snow was silly. Good thing Frank is a good biker and knows what he is doing. I am still waiting for my bike lesson. Come on Frank, you are supposted to be my positive male role model!



UPDATE: I spoke too soon when me and mom said that Frank thought that biking in this amount of snow was silly. He is completely unrepentant in his love of biking in the snow and has enjoyed every minute of getting around in the blizzard.

Mom forgot to pay the bills

Mom forgot to pay the ConED bill and they shut off the electricity. I was minding my own buisness and all of a sudden I am surrounded by darkenss. Mom's brother JR was there thank god but it is really scary to not see where you are going. Now I heard from mom that she does not want to come home untill they turn on the service because she is scared of infestation. Yuck.

Silver City

Frank decided to make mom rent "Silver City" yesterday and it turned out to be a good movie. It is a John Sayles film, which means that the cast and the acting are going to be great, and there is no doubt going to be a political messege.
The cast was stellar, Chris Cooper is always fantastic. The most shocking to me was Daryl Hannah she looked like an amazon women/olympic hopeful slut. Which brings me to amazon women, I learned that they used to cut off their boobs to make themselves better at the sport, and it helped aid in their survival.

Very interesting.
The political aspects of the movie it self were a bit scary to me, when I realized it was baced on a certian president mom did not vote for. I wont ruin it for you all but the ending makes a person want to never swim again.

Happy Birthday to Me!!!!

Today I am 1 years old!!!!! Let me give you a breif history about how I came to write this blog.
I was in a cage at the Dartmouth Mall,

When mom came in with Alica and Jude and picked me out. I loved mom right away and forced her to buy me. "How much is that Doggy in the window?" was playing in the background. They took me back to Alicia's house in New Bedford,

and I met Yukie for the first time. I was so sleep from being drugged in the Pet store so I slept on mom for hours. After smelling grass, and going for walkes it was time for me to move on and go to Boston to meet Grandma for the first time.

It was fun there but it rained and grandma talked to me in a stupid voice and petted me too much. After a few days there is was time to go on to Mom's home in NYC, I rode in a car with some of mom's brothers JR and Michael,

And they kicked me around, and played rough with me.
Mom rescued me and showed me where I would be sleeping and I started to settle in, and make NYC my home.

I met Frank a few days later and discovered the salt lick! Thanks mom for rescueing me from the Pet store and bringing me on adventures all over!

Mom Poisons Us

I am lying on the Floor taking a nap, and mom is on the phone with grandma and all is well. All of a sudden mom screams so loud it makes me run and hide under the bed, but I still keep my head out to peep the scene. She gets the hammer and starts banging it on the desk-screaming die, shit heads die. First of all the language is an issue, and second of all what is she killing? I don’t have time to find out, because she starts spraying RAID all over the desk. It smells so bad that I can’t really be in the same room with her, And it makes my hair curl.

I go to the kitchen but there is no escaping the smell. I can’t really see clearly and I am finding it hard to stand up. Mom is coughing and turns on the air conditioner, and we go and sit in the bathroom with the small window open. She tells me that a nest of baby roaches has hatched and is all over the desk. Gross, Gross! They are nasty and small and like my food dish. I understand why mom got so scared, but both of us can’t go back to the bedroom yet because the smell is so bad. Finally at 2am, we go and lie down in bed, I still can’t breath right, and mom has a headache. We go to sleep, and have Raid filled dreams.

Back without presents

Usually I am not that greedy, but considering that this was my first time away from mom for such a long time I was hopeing for a present when she came back. Katie and Rick were good to me, they took me on long walks, and fed me all sorts of treats. Mom was right all Kaite did was try on Mom's clothes, and Rick watched TV.
Mom and Frank came back at 12am, huffing and puffing up the stairs. I heard them on level D, but I waited and did not bark. Mom came running in and scooped me up and the next thing I remember was licking her neck for an hour. Frank fell asleep cause he had to get up for work at like 6:30am, but he did not get away without being licked.
All night I was sniffing around for a present, but could not find anything. In the morning I even let mom sleep later than normal, but when she woke up there was still no present. It is good to have them back, and they told me San Diego was Fun, but come on I am a bit hurt that they did not bring me a present. I'll show them, I'll leave mom a present (self-made) at the end of the bed.

Mom and Frank are leaving me

For 5 whole days, Mom and Frank are going to San Diego without me!!! That is so unfair, I want to go to California. My thought was to just drive there, cause I am not such a big fan of Airplanes, but come on I would fly. I hope I won't be scared without them, Like I was scared to go into the pool.

I have babysitters who I think are going to come and stay with me, Rick and Katie. They are mom's friends and people she is in Red Star with who live near by. I like them a lot, but all Rick does is watch Sports on the TV and Katie goes around the apartment and tries on Mom's clothes. I hope the will pet me a lot Because I am going to be sad mom is leaving for so long. I guess on the positive side I will have a lot of time to work on my Blog.

It's a sad sad day in Hollywood

It has finally happened, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have split. I was holding my breath all these years, and I was right couples in California can not last. What is more disturbing is that CNN, the post and others covered the Brad and Jen split and put it up along side with the tsunami disaster. As a young puppy in NYC, I am always yearning to know all the inside gossip of the stars, but this has crossed the line. When the papers and the news channels, and the Internet makes this stupid story "big news" it is so awful!

What's next, how about lets take half of the Red Cross fund and donate it to the Brad and Jen sadness fund. Maybe then it will clear up all the tears shed in Hollywood on this sad sad day,

Stand-Up Comedy

Mom and Frank dragged me to see mom's friend do live comedy. Good thing it was free because I learned from other dogs to never pay for Comedy if you are going to be stuck listening to awkward and bad other people. Judah Friedlander is who mom and Frank were there to see, I like him (but he pretends to be allergic to me).

He's really not, because I am hypo-allergic thank you very much, but he has a whole stick about it! Anyway he was performing at some comedy club down the street and they allowed me to come in or more like forced me. Once I sat down that's when the berating began. I was made fun of in a mean way, my voice was pointed out and they made fun of Frank liking me. Some women who were not even funny told Frank that he must hate to have to take mom and me out, like I'm some kind of burden. Judah finally came on stage, and told the audience that this place was such a dump that they had to have dogs as audience members. I think that though it is funny it was not nice. I thought he was my friend. The lesson learned is that dogs should not come to comedy clubs, Mom and Frank should only see comedy when the people are good. And lastly it is more painful to wait and listen to 3 really bad comics while waiting for the one good comic (Judah), than If I were to wax my whole body.